what is painful
have you ever pinched yourself and tried to analyze pain? or feeling? what is feeling exactly? when you pinch yourself, you can kinda think of the sensation as nothing and it wont hurt... i mean, it'll hurt, but you can kinda dull the pain with your mind by thinking of it as just a feeling. but thats only when youre pinching yourself. somehow, you cant analyze and dull pain when youre being pinched by someone else. what is painful?
i guess we can never really describe feeling, what feels good or what feels bad, what feels right and what feels wrong. we just know it. but of all the pains ive ever felt, nothing has hurt more than needing that someone more than she could ever need you. knowing that all you have to offer to your "you" is your love, but knowing at the same time that it just isnt enough to get her to love you back. knowing that you dont mean jack as much to her as she means to you. what is painful? i cant describe painful per se, albeit i can safely say that i can describe what it feels like. it feels like someones pulling on the bottom of my chest and on the top of my chest simultaneously - this prompts invisible knots of discomfort to surge up my throat and out my mouth, but nothing comes out. instead, these invisible knots transform into tiny pins that poke at the back of my eyes thus drawing a watery substance, tears, to envelope my eyes. i was talking to a friend who i discovered had recently started smoking... i asked him why he started. he says it isnt to be cool, rather, its to relieve stress from depression. upon hearing that, i've considered just what sort of relief exactly cigarettes would serve me from these tedious intervals of depression i've been feeling. but i know if i do give in to such trivial vices to vent my sorrows, i would be weak, and i refuse to be that weak person. but why is it that when im trying to be strong, that i feel so weak? its like theres nothing i cant not do to not not be weak.
have you heard of the term, "blindingly painful"? i think thats the most dreadful form of painful. being blinded by your own tears due to pain. yeah, so just what exactly is painful? im no psychologist, psychiatrist, emotion guru, or whatever, but i know enough to say that what im feeling right now - this is painful. blindingly painful.
i guess we can never really describe feeling, what feels good or what feels bad, what feels right and what feels wrong. we just know it. but of all the pains ive ever felt, nothing has hurt more than needing that someone more than she could ever need you. knowing that all you have to offer to your "you" is your love, but knowing at the same time that it just isnt enough to get her to love you back. knowing that you dont mean jack as much to her as she means to you. what is painful? i cant describe painful per se, albeit i can safely say that i can describe what it feels like. it feels like someones pulling on the bottom of my chest and on the top of my chest simultaneously - this prompts invisible knots of discomfort to surge up my throat and out my mouth, but nothing comes out. instead, these invisible knots transform into tiny pins that poke at the back of my eyes thus drawing a watery substance, tears, to envelope my eyes. i was talking to a friend who i discovered had recently started smoking... i asked him why he started. he says it isnt to be cool, rather, its to relieve stress from depression. upon hearing that, i've considered just what sort of relief exactly cigarettes would serve me from these tedious intervals of depression i've been feeling. but i know if i do give in to such trivial vices to vent my sorrows, i would be weak, and i refuse to be that weak person. but why is it that when im trying to be strong, that i feel so weak? its like theres nothing i cant not do to not not be weak.
have you heard of the term, "blindingly painful"? i think thats the most dreadful form of painful. being blinded by your own tears due to pain. yeah, so just what exactly is painful? im no psychologist, psychiatrist, emotion guru, or whatever, but i know enough to say that what im feeling right now - this is painful. blindingly painful.
hey... wow you're really a good writer hehehe.. sounds like youre in a tough situation? is it true? if it is im sorry... i know you don't know me, know me, but is there any way i can help you relieve you off the pain? hehe sorry for asking, just wanted to help
tc!
Posted by
geri |
3/4/06 2:01 PM
hmmm.. you can give me tips on how to.. make a girl fall for me? hehe! kidding. i honestly dont even know myself what'd make me feel better - the concern helps alot though. also you thinking that im a good writer helps too(if youre not flattering)! maraming salamat! :)
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
3/4/06 9:26 PM
it's all good:) im happy to be of help:) just be yourself and... uhh that's pretty much it, or maybe i can't think of anythin right now, hehe sowi:( and i DO think you're a great writer:)
did you add me in ym? hehe just askin
Posted by
geri |
4/4/06 12:29 PM
yep, hope you dont mind. being myself, apparently, doesnt work ._. rawr
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
4/4/06 2:01 PM
aww... well, i'll think of something else then i'll just ym you haha... i like your icon
Posted by
geri |
5/4/06 11:51 AM
aight, thanks. hope you think of somethin, anything! :)
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
5/4/06 1:20 PM
for the millionth time..go out..go find a girl and take her on a nice date..remember everything i taught you....haha
Posted by
el conejito loco |
5/4/06 10:02 PM
yea, i think i should take your advice now... i really want to, but theres noone to go out with though and i dont really know how to "pick up" girls.. wow, loser =___=
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
6/4/06 9:16 AM
gabe, you are such a poet. hahah!
Posted by
Phoebe |
6/4/06 9:02 PM
nooo.. you are, pheebs! :D
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
6/4/06 9:47 PM
gabe...you are such a good writer!haay...the pain...oh well, i think you're going out with a girl this summer nman eh...dba?hahaha!btw, thanx for all your advices and tips for a busy summer stuff...=)
Posted by
kRis |
7/4/06 8:08 PM
oi, thanks maricris! wow, good writer.. hahaha.. right! das nice. wait a minute, whaddya mean by im going out with a girl this summer naman e? no girls for me this summer.. haha! :P
Posted by
gabrielangelo |
8/4/06 8:59 AM